My plans for the day didn't conform to my will. I planned on spending the day working on my current art quilt. Nothing was cooperating and when that happens you just have to walk away. I turned on a movie that, to my knowledge, I hadn't seen before..."Mona Lisa Smile".
At first I was thrilled that this professor at a women's college in the 50's was teaching about art. What a great substitute for when your art doesn't cooperate, watch a movie about it. This movie wrecked me in more ways than I can wrap my head around.
As a woman who didn't get to attend college, part of me was jealous at all these young girls who got to go. However, part of me was outraged that it had been drilled into them that the objective was not a career, but to become the perfect wife/mother. Goal: get married and be a stay at home wife. There was no striving for both. Really???
No one cares if you are really happy just as long as you appear to be, that is what mattered. I understand it was the 50's and it was a different time... But is it really all that different from today?
No one cares if you are really happy just as long as you appear to be, that is what mattered. I understand it was the 50's and it was a different time... But is it really all that different from today?
Think about it with me for a moment if you will. What do we portray to the world? What do we post on social media? What do we blog about? What exposure do we allow?
These last few years God has really been breaking me out of my box that was pretty darn comfortable. He started exposing me to different ways of looking at things. We will use my art for example because that is a safe topic...lol.
I prayed for God to give me the abilities to be an artist like my friend. My friend was doing more with her art and being so creative that I literally had holy jealousy. I prayed hard for God to unlock my creativity. When I say I prayed I hard, I mean HARD! So hard that I cried from the deepest depths of the very core of my being.
Warning my friend, when you ask Papa God for a gift, you are going to get it. It just might not come the way that you imagined.
My creativity had rules and boundaries. I followed patterns and only deviated in what I thought was acceptable to the confines of the pattern. Everything was perfect, uniform, geometric, and things had to coordinate. Patterns that don't coordinate next to each other...WHAT?? You want me to lose my every-loving mind? I was very rigid and to top it off, I was my own worst critic.
I remember the day that I was watching "Quilting Arts" on PBS. I always watched it just in case they taught a technique I didn't know as their modern quilting was not for me. This particular show had a lady that made these off the wall, abstract quilted portraits. This lady and her uninhibited art quilts spoke to my spirit. I heard God tell me, "You can do that. I want you to make your own portrait."
That was the day that God awoke something in me and helped to bring me out of my box. I made my own abstract portrait quilt and through that obedience, unlocked a treasure chest of creativity. Nothing that I was used to, nothing that I would allow myself to think was art before was now my passion!
I got excited about what I call "Prophecy in Fabric"...my art quilts.
In the Bible, Romans 12:2 tells us not to be conformed by this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. In school I am learning about my Heavenly Identity and how renewing our mind is seeing yourself the way God does. Victory and freedom are available just by changing your thoughts about yourself. Huge revelation when you renew what you think about who you are and what you can do.
As I sat there after that movie thinking about all the different ways, we let folks tells us how to be or what we should be...I started thinking about how much influence we have on ourselves. I put myself in that box. I put my creativity in that box. I am the one that trained me that I had to strive for perfection. I am the one that set those stupid rules that I insisted I follow. I am the one that said that what I created was not art. I am the one that told me what I was to conform to.
Well I got news for me. What I create is art. It is fabric art and I am a fabric artist. I can't believe how much fun I have now that I have removed the so-called rules.
Whose lies are you believing? Who are you conforming to? Do you feel trapped in your box? I have a secret to tell you, that there is no box, it is not there. Push those walls down! Be and do what your heart desires!
Ask God to help you make those dreams come true. He will help you, especially if you let Him co-create with you. That is when the real you will be revealed. Break out and be the real you. Be transformed into who God created you to be.
Until Next Time, God Bless!
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| Lord You Humble Me |
